Things have been quite calm. As long as the kids are at school, and I must say it has only been 2 weeks! I got a little job this weekend to help pay some bills, you know another mouth to feed. Weird how when I am home, she stays in her room a lot of the day. But when I am gone, she sit out in the kitchen to make sure she sees everything the girls are doing. That is not much because they are afraid to come into the light with her, never knowing what the will find. So the next day when I worked B stayed home so she would have someone to be with. Really it was more for the girls, so they could move around and be teens. Well, she stayed in her room until I returned home. I would think she would want to hang out with her only child but I guess he was not offering to take her to the casino. All of a sudden the loudest crash I have heard since, V pulled the dresser over on herself with the tv on top. Well, can you believe it when I ran in the room. There was my "Toddler" laying on her back on the floor with the dresser on top of her. I hope she was not crawling up to find the jelly beans like V did! B comes running in and gets the dresser off her, we tried to call the aid car, but she was fine. Boy were we going to pay for that one for a long while. You can name a body part and it hurts, she needs help, "I hope that you will find it in your heart to make me breakfast and lunch tomorrow!" Of coarse, and I decide it is time for me to go to bed.
The next morning, she does not come out of her room, she does not take her meds on time, and there is all hell to pay at dinner. The girls have only joined us a handful of times at the table, and tonight was no different. She would like to know why no one cares how she is feeling. Her family is a caring family that care about and asks about each other. Wow, the "toddler" knows that there are others in this world? I can't believe it, but it is all about her not getting enough attention when falling.
Wednesday, January 22, 2014
Sunday, January 12, 2014
"My 70 year old toddler's mouth is running a muck!"
And the Coaster has started at full speed!!!WOW didn't see that drop coming!!!!! "My 70 year old toddler's mouth is running a muck!"
( I just knew that the car would be an issue since she was coming back! Background on the PT Cruiser, it was her car, she gave it to B many time and took it back many times, finally the last time she gave it, the title was changed. The next time she wanted it back and we wouldn't change the title, so she throw away the only key.)
"Can I ask you a question with you starting a fight?" well that question straight out makes my hair stand on end......... "what'ch need?"
"I would like to know why the PT Cruiser has been moved when B told me that the keys had been lost." (Translation...... I would like to know why J is driving the PT Cruiser?..... J is our 17 year old, my "toddler" has always had a problem with the thought of her driving the car. If it was out 22 year old that does not make the best choices then it would not be a problem because as you know from my first blog that she is the chosen one! at one point B was going to drive the Cruiser and J would drive the sports car. Just to keep the Drama down.)
"The key was lost as you are aware, a few months ago we had a new key made. Is there a problem?"
"YES! I DON"T LIKE TO BE LIED TOO!!!!"
No one has lied to her. Why is it only when B is at work? I try so hard to stay calm and I just can't I just can't hear her talk and talk to bitch, and not reply.........
"No one has lied to you! The key was lost! We paid the $300 to get a new one, and the car is being used. (My statement I should have bit my tong on) And why should you care?"
"Because I was lied to, B said the reason he was not driving his car to work was because the PT Cruiser was behind his"?
"No the reason he does not drive his car is because the Garage door is broke and he can't get his car out!"
The communication breaks down fast....... I just want her to stop talking........ But she can't she has to have the last word (is that bi-polar? or just her?) Don't know. So I end it by saying I don't want a big fight on my hands and walk away. She keeps making the sounds that should be words but I just can't listen.
It has been a week of her in bed, and as any "toddler" there is to much built up energy and the way she lets it out is by running her mouth..... That's when I know without a shadow of a doubt that I like 2 and 3 year old toddlers!
( I just knew that the car would be an issue since she was coming back! Background on the PT Cruiser, it was her car, she gave it to B many time and took it back many times, finally the last time she gave it, the title was changed. The next time she wanted it back and we wouldn't change the title, so she throw away the only key.)
"Can I ask you a question with you starting a fight?" well that question straight out makes my hair stand on end......... "what'ch need?"
"I would like to know why the PT Cruiser has been moved when B told me that the keys had been lost." (Translation...... I would like to know why J is driving the PT Cruiser?..... J is our 17 year old, my "toddler" has always had a problem with the thought of her driving the car. If it was out 22 year old that does not make the best choices then it would not be a problem because as you know from my first blog that she is the chosen one! at one point B was going to drive the Cruiser and J would drive the sports car. Just to keep the Drama down.)
"The key was lost as you are aware, a few months ago we had a new key made. Is there a problem?"
"YES! I DON"T LIKE TO BE LIED TOO!!!!"
No one has lied to her. Why is it only when B is at work? I try so hard to stay calm and I just can't I just can't hear her talk and talk to bitch, and not reply.........
"No one has lied to you! The key was lost! We paid the $300 to get a new one, and the car is being used. (My statement I should have bit my tong on) And why should you care?"
"Because I was lied to, B said the reason he was not driving his car to work was because the PT Cruiser was behind his"?
"No the reason he does not drive his car is because the Garage door is broke and he can't get his car out!"
The communication breaks down fast....... I just want her to stop talking........ But she can't she has to have the last word (is that bi-polar? or just her?) Don't know. So I end it by saying I don't want a big fight on my hands and walk away. She keeps making the sounds that should be words but I just can't listen.
It has been a week of her in bed, and as any "toddler" there is to much built up energy and the way she lets it out is by running her mouth..... That's when I know without a shadow of a doubt that I like 2 and 3 year old toddlers!
Friday, January 10, 2014
Roller coaster on an even slope down.... almost a week in
It's Friday!!!!!!! Yeah, Don't have to get the teens up and going tomorrow, but my "toddler" is never changing. The week has been crazy, the girls are adjusting well I guess. They do great in school when she is here, they all hide out in their rooms. Haven't had to many run in with her yet. She has mostly been sleeping, and complaining, about not being able to more. While watching the "Taste" last night she wanted to know what a personal chef is. B replies that it is a person that comes in and cooks for the family or an event. She replies "WOW, I wish I had one of those!" I say "That's funny isn't that what I am?" The funnies part of her being here is her little comments. Some, that if don't have to live with her or care for her probably are hard to understand! It's the little things, like saying I sit on my butt all day watching Soaps! Or she ate the last piece of bread, and not just saying can you put bread on the shopping list, she says "maybe you could find in your heart to buy some bread". Then the next day she says she needs to go to the store and could I remind her to buy bread for her lunch. Mind you this is as she is watching me make bread. The same thing I've done for sometime now. She lived here for over 18 months the last time, and I have a very strict food routine. There are 5 now 6 of us in the house, I shop every other Saturday (PAY DAY BABY) and stay under 3 hundred dollars! For a "toddle" that is a hard thing to understand, and for my "70 year old toddler" that has never lived within a routine it is VERY hard. I have 1 diabetic (now), 1 vegetarian, 1 carnivore, and 3 that just would like to east good food!
When she wants to comment on something she doesn't like, she pulls in the girls. "I am aware that you two hid out in your room for awhile (maybe 5 minutes), are the girls having problems?" Sadly she would love the girls to have problems. It would show that our commitment to keep me at home to raise the kids with our morals and do our best to have amazing adults, would be for nothing. But really she just wanted us to know that she sees every thing we do. Next week it will be that we are hiding talking about her..... And so it starts!
This week is mostly getting use to life with a "sick" person, trying to be positive for my family, and hoping she would act like a normal person. I have never been around people that are "sick". I come from a family of go-getters, workers, positive, happy people. It does make me wonder what my husband would be like if he was not raised by 2 mentally ill women.
When she wants to comment on something she doesn't like, she pulls in the girls. "I am aware that you two hid out in your room for awhile (maybe 5 minutes), are the girls having problems?" Sadly she would love the girls to have problems. It would show that our commitment to keep me at home to raise the kids with our morals and do our best to have amazing adults, would be for nothing. But really she just wanted us to know that she sees every thing we do. Next week it will be that we are hiding talking about her..... And so it starts!
This week is mostly getting use to life with a "sick" person, trying to be positive for my family, and hoping she would act like a normal person. I have never been around people that are "sick". I come from a family of go-getters, workers, positive, happy people. It does make me wonder what my husband would be like if he was not raised by 2 mentally ill women.
Tuesday, January 7, 2014
The Beginning of The Roller Coaster once again.
Background story....... I am the Mother of 5 amazing children, 4 I birthed and 1 came with my husband. We have been married for 17 years. My husband, a only child with only his Mother and Aunt living! In those two lies a lot of life's challenges. Not saying that 3 teenage girls is a challenge, but they are challenges that I "signed" up for. I'm sure some of my day is spent figuring out how to raise them into WONDERFUL adults, but the other part is my "70 year old toddler" that has spent the last 5 years moving into and out of our loving home. Would it be different if she was my mother instead of my husbands? Well, YES to a point!!!!!! At least my mother I know without a question loves me. My "Toddler" on the other hand has done nothing but tell me of her dislikes for me. I have done nothing but love her son, and take great care of her granddaughters! Funny think is his CRAZY AUNT (who has not spoken to me in over 2 years) agrees with her. See I married a man with a ex-wife, a 5 year old daughter, an Aunt (that is in love with him), and a Mother (that really wanted a girl, I guess she blames him for being a boy)!!! I should say none of these women want ANYONE else in his life (not even each other, but not a wife and 3 girls)!!!!!!! My "toddler" has moved in and out of the house many time, and never leaves on good terms, always has to stab you a couple of times really good as she goes!
The here and NOW.......My "70 year old toddler" called once again to be saved!!! From herself , her mental illness "B, please please please come get me I don't think I can move I need help!! I have someone to take my dog if I die tonight, I can't move my arm I can't walk, can you please discuss it and come help your dear old mom" (a week prior it was NOT this way!, she would never forgive him, wanted to never speak to him again). When I hear the message I hear it differently "The savings if getting low and she needs someone to cook and clean for her, take care of her dog, and drive her where ever she wants to go when ever she want to. Here we go AGAIN......... "Do you mind if mom moves back in? I knew at some point she would need our help?" what am I to say???? So I say, "Do you think she is going to be nice? She understands that the girls come first? Why does she want to move in someplace that she hates?" No need to answer that one........... Because she needs a maid, a cook, and a driver!!!!!
It is left to me to tell our amazing girls (who she loves as much as me) we are taking in the "toddler" once again. That she needs our help, she is Dad's Mom. Wasn't the worst responses but let's face it we are all sick of the ROLLER COASTER.....
Sunday we make the 4 hour drive to Vegas, packed her boxes in the car, grabbed In-N-Out on our way out of town and were back in the Desert by 5pm. The ride started nice, like "It's a Small World" thank you for saving me, I don't know what I would have done! then slowly started on the kiddie roller coaster.. I hope that you all will be nice to me! Then it off to "Space Mountain" you know it is going to go down but no drops! I hope that you will let me spend my last days with my dog, I hope the girls do not HATE me forever! I guess a slow start is better that falling off the cliff without warning........ but I really don't like roller coasters! I can start to feel the water around me from "Splash Mountain" I want to be in charge of my own meds (bi-polar, diabetic, high blood pressure, the list goes on and on), I want my dog to stay in the room with me, I want house keys, I don't want a schedule, and I will make my own food (unless I am to sick to do so, and then I want to be waited on hand and foot) OH and I forgot, I want to have my TV on all night, so I can hear it..... You see calling her my "70 year old toddler" is for good reason...... Toddlers have not figured out that there are other people in their world.....
We make it home, I hope we can start over (how many times can you start over?) But once again all the girls in the house smile that OH SO fake one and say sure (thinking yep until you only want to talk about the past).
So our week starts, my sweet husband that has been raised by two bi-polar women, thinks the best way to handle all of this is just for everyone to get along. If I hear it one more time I am going to SCREAM!!!!!!! I try very hard to get along, but I will not allow anyone to talk bad about the people I love! So I guess I go into the 5th no 6th, no maybe 7th heck I have lost count of how many times we have started over with the "if she could just get along"
My "toddle" has been in her room all but a couple of hours in the last two days. I really think she is waiting for me to "help" her more, I know that her meds are a mess and her diet it anything but healthy. If she was in reality a toddler I would haul her ass out of bed and make her eat and take her meds. Maybe even if she was my mom I could do that. But she is not, and I am letting a sleeping dog (toddler) lie......
The here and NOW.......My "70 year old toddler" called once again to be saved!!! From herself , her mental illness "B, please please please come get me I don't think I can move I need help!! I have someone to take my dog if I die tonight, I can't move my arm I can't walk, can you please discuss it and come help your dear old mom" (a week prior it was NOT this way!, she would never forgive him, wanted to never speak to him again). When I hear the message I hear it differently "The savings if getting low and she needs someone to cook and clean for her, take care of her dog, and drive her where ever she wants to go when ever she want to. Here we go AGAIN......... "Do you mind if mom moves back in? I knew at some point she would need our help?" what am I to say???? So I say, "Do you think she is going to be nice? She understands that the girls come first? Why does she want to move in someplace that she hates?" No need to answer that one........... Because she needs a maid, a cook, and a driver!!!!!
It is left to me to tell our amazing girls (who she loves as much as me) we are taking in the "toddler" once again. That she needs our help, she is Dad's Mom. Wasn't the worst responses but let's face it we are all sick of the ROLLER COASTER.....
Sunday we make the 4 hour drive to Vegas, packed her boxes in the car, grabbed In-N-Out on our way out of town and were back in the Desert by 5pm. The ride started nice, like "It's a Small World" thank you for saving me, I don't know what I would have done! then slowly started on the kiddie roller coaster.. I hope that you all will be nice to me! Then it off to "Space Mountain" you know it is going to go down but no drops! I hope that you will let me spend my last days with my dog, I hope the girls do not HATE me forever! I guess a slow start is better that falling off the cliff without warning........ but I really don't like roller coasters! I can start to feel the water around me from "Splash Mountain" I want to be in charge of my own meds (bi-polar, diabetic, high blood pressure, the list goes on and on), I want my dog to stay in the room with me, I want house keys, I don't want a schedule, and I will make my own food (unless I am to sick to do so, and then I want to be waited on hand and foot) OH and I forgot, I want to have my TV on all night, so I can hear it..... You see calling her my "70 year old toddler" is for good reason...... Toddlers have not figured out that there are other people in their world.....
We make it home, I hope we can start over (how many times can you start over?) But once again all the girls in the house smile that OH SO fake one and say sure (thinking yep until you only want to talk about the past).
So our week starts, my sweet husband that has been raised by two bi-polar women, thinks the best way to handle all of this is just for everyone to get along. If I hear it one more time I am going to SCREAM!!!!!!! I try very hard to get along, but I will not allow anyone to talk bad about the people I love! So I guess I go into the 5th no 6th, no maybe 7th heck I have lost count of how many times we have started over with the "if she could just get along"
My "toddle" has been in her room all but a couple of hours in the last two days. I really think she is waiting for me to "help" her more, I know that her meds are a mess and her diet it anything but healthy. If she was in reality a toddler I would haul her ass out of bed and make her eat and take her meds. Maybe even if she was my mom I could do that. But she is not, and I am letting a sleeping dog (toddler) lie......
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